Pre-solo Written Exam

This is an open-book written exam. You may use any source, but must cite that source. There is no time limit.

1 Define and list the following speeds for your PA-28-235:

Vs Very Slow – Less than 10 kph. Usually when chasing a fuel truck

Vs0 Very slow, Over. What you say on the radio when they ask your airspeed.

Vx The mystery speed. The speed you go on all checkrides.

Vy Why? Because I like it.

Va The Veteran’s Administration speed. Even slower than Vs

Vfe The Iron speed. Only large aircraft can fly this fast. That’s why they’re called “big iron”

Vno Don’t go there, speed. Just say NO

Vne The speed you must attain before hitting a shrubbery. The tower will say “NI”

2 What is the aircraft’s best glide speed? When is it used?

It’s the speed at which the aircraft glides best.

It is used on pre-solo tests.

3 List the procedures to respond to an in-flight engine failure.

1) Scream

2) Key the microphone and scream

3) Open the window

4) Smack your instructor’s hand off the throttle control

5) Smoothly re advance the throttle, holding your clipboard in a threatening manner

4 List the procedures to respond to an engine fire on the ground while starting.

1) Open the door

2) Leap out of the aircraft

3) Yell “oh my god, there’s a fire:

4) Designate a first officer to put it out

5 Will the engine still run if the master switch is turned off? Why or why not?

It depends on whether the Hobbs is wired to the master switch. Everyone knows that the aircraft engine is powered directly from the Hobbs meter.

6 What are wing-tip vortices (wake turbulence)? Which what aircraft are they greatest? Describe proper avoidance.

Wing tip vortices are little black holes that are formed by improper landing technique. They suck all matter surrounding them into the vortex, which is the leading cause of aircraft accidents. Which what aircraft is a typo, so I don’t have to answer the question, but the worst aircraft for wing tip vortices is anything flown by Stephen Ames. Proper avoidance consists of an amulet of anti-matter, and avoiding Carroll County.

7 What endorsements are required for solo flight? What three documents must you have in your possession to solo an aircraft as a student?

The endorsement required is the one at the bottom of the check given to the CFI before he climbs out of the airplane. The three documents include 1) your life insurance policy, with the CFI as beneficiary. 2) a letter from your mother 3) a pregnant chad.

8 What is a “wheelbarrow”? How do you stop/prevent it?

A one wheel garden wagon, often used for hauling manure. You stop it by puncturing its one tire.

9 What is a “porpoise”? How do you stop/prevent it?

A porpoise is a marine mammal, often mistaken for a fish. You stop it by draining the water tank, or by shooting it between the eyes.

10 For Montgomery and Frederick, list the traffic pattern altitude, noise abatement procedures, UNICOM frequency, direction of turns (all runways).

The traffic pattern altitude is the height at which you fly the pattern. Noise abatement procedures are those procedures to abate the maximum amount of noise, and you fly all turns towards the runway.

11 The __ugliest______ of two aircraft on approach to the same runway has the right of way.

12 What are you, a student pilot, required to have before entering Class B airspace?

An airplane

13 What would happen to the fuel indicators if all electricity in the airplane was lost?

It wouldn’t matter because it would be too dark to read them.

14 What is the minimum amount of time a pilot is supposed to wait after consuming alcohol?

8 feet from bottle to throttle.

15 What is the fuel capacity of your PA-28-235? How much is usable? How much in each tank?

The fuel capacity of the PA-28-235 is the amount of fuel you can fit in the tanks. The useable fuel is the amount you can use. Each tank is always full.

16 On landing with a slight crosswind from the left, you notice that the airplane suddenly swerves to the right shortly after touchdown. What happened? How can this be prevented?

It meant I was listening to the instructor who kept yelling “right rudder.” This can be prevented by throwing the instructor out of the aircraft.

17 Briefly explain what to do with the prop control.

Duct tape it in the full forward position.

18 While sumping the tanks, you notice that the fuel in one tank is red in color. An instructor nearby comments, “glad to see someone found a source for 80 octane; it must run a lot better than with 100 LL”. How do you reply?

You say, “no, that’s the blood of the last instructor who tried to fuck up my preflight.”

19 Shortly after takeoff, the engine begins to run rough and lose power. What do you do? What is the most probable single cause? How can you best prevent this?

You plummet out of the sky. The most probable single cause is that the instructor has gained weight. I can prevent this by always flying solo and watching what I eat.